May Cain who bears the bunch
Upon his back, of thorns,
Stand by my lover’s bed,
And make him rise from sleep
And hasten to my home.
O Cain! O Cain! O Cain!
Three times I call to thee,
Call with my loudest voice,
Just as I find myself between sea and sky,
And my two friends with me.
Charles Godfrey Leland (author of Aradia, Gospel of the Witches; 1899) writing in 1895, relates a love-spell invoking Cain in the Moon, together with a prepared casket containing candles, salt, a mirror, and a photographic negative of the object of the witch’s affections. A portion of the entreaty reads as above. (via The Cauldron magazine)
The ancient Cainite sect, though scholars minimize its place in the greater historical purview of Gnosis, is also notable for its soteriology of ‘Passing through All Things’ in order to receive salvation or illumination. This antinomian and transgressive view of Ordeal as a specifically spiritual arena finds philosophical resonance in the Sabbatic Tradition. The status of the initiate as an astral pilgrim, or wanderer-of-spirit, passing through endless experience to gain power, is a cipher of the Witches’ Sabbath itself – the heightened ecstatic state akin to the alchemical Al-Ambiq, wherein all manner of fleshly bodies pass, to be transmuted into the most rarefied of spirits.
Daniel A. SchulkeCainite Gnosis and the Sabbatic Tradition (via iopanosiris)

I’m done, no more.

I have deleted all my dating apps, hook up apps, all of it. 

I’m done, no more. 

I have been telling myself I am learning to love myself for the past year now. But it’s not self love for me when I religiously check okcupid every morning. Looking for that glimmer of sexual approval from others on an intimate, personal level, even subconsciously.

It’s not. I had a hook up tonight in place of the other guy. This man wanted something more. I wanted something more. But we were different, so different. And I said no. And I hurt him and I both.

I got so attached so quickly because there wasn’t enough self love in me. Enough solidarity. Stability. I knew we weren’t compatible. We were so different. We barely talked with forced conversations. He found my craft strange and unusual. I found him so beautiful. He found me so beautiful. But he was different. Different hobbies. Different interests. I sensed it, saw it, concluded such for me. And I don’t know. Maybe he wasn’t but it didn’t feel right and I follow my instincts, always, especially when it was that strong. 

I knew clearly, that if I said yes, I would be keeping him for his body, for sex. Not love when he would have wanted so. It was a vision almost like a prophecy. 

And no more. Tonight was a wake up call. Before it was just hurting me, but I am getting more and more intuitive, and tonight, I hurt him too giving all kinds of weird mixed signals, and he did nothing wrong. I could feel it, how I hurt him.

I will deal with the loneliness. I will deal with the solitude. I will find and nurture and cry enough tears of love into myself for myself if I have to.

But no more.

I will never let my loneliness, my hunger for affection, my yearnings hurt another innocent bystander like that ever again.

I will find another way to nurture myself.

No more. I’m done.

It’s me with me now, until something so right and naturally unfolding comes along, that I am happy and tasting and enjoying every moment of it and so is he. 

I didn’t think I could before, but now, I feel brave enough and secure enough to do it. I am doing it. No more hurting, others or myself like this. It isn’t right for me. I can’t just do hook ups, brief encounters. Use and let another use my body like that in hopes I will accidentally bump into love. And that’s all I have gotten even if hook ups can be different for others. And I will not have love work like that for me. 

I am done, no more.

I accept that it is hard for the mainstream to love me on such a deep and personal and intimate level.

I am trans* (Genderqueer), and queer, and feminine. And I defy boundaries.

I am a witch after all, and I will make my love enough for myself.



So kind of unexpected but I did my first initiation today

Im officially a witch

Now all y’all nonbinary pagans come be my friend

This my baby, I’m a mother now :’) And before y’all ask. No it wasn’t into any established tradition except for my own stream of witchcraft and the overall cunning of witchery and the crooked path within and without. And no, it isn’t a year and a day, because I’m not NeoWiccan, and it was spur of the moment because the spirits and divination and our communication moved me to.

And no it wasn’t a deep initiation rite so don’t freak out, but the mark of a beginning of something new. A dedication.

Just thought I would get all those questions out of the way first so we don’t have trolling “real witches TM.”, talking shit and arguing about the semantics of the word “initiation”.

And no I can’t tell you what the rite was because secrets have power, but it was the same dedication I did four years ago after a year of reading and studying. 

I’m so proud of you luv!

So there’s a bummer.

A boy and I didn’t work out, different places in life, different priorities. 

I wonder if I still count as a witch if love is the one thing that slips through my hands. 

It’s situational too of course, and just society, stupid society. AA tiny part of my brain whispers “sure blame everyone but you”. But what fault do I have? I have long hair. I’m “too feminine”.

I’m not a perfect little saint cuz I’m a goddamn witch.

Yeah. thought so. 

Will any of my sexy queer boy followers humor me and tell me I’m pretty and they will totally date me. 

I amd attracted to bears and twinks and bigger lads and smaller lads, and non binary masc folks and Chinese folks, and Black Folks, and White folks, and East Asian Folks and all races cuz you know judging your physical attraction by race is just fucking racist because it assumes everyone of the same racial background all look the same. 



The witch mirror “There are witch mirrors, and there are witch mirrors, but of all the mirrors used by witches this one is the top. This type of mirror was turned out in some quantity for one comes across examples up and down the country. To date I know of seven others exactly the same. Of course, a familiar spirit has been conjured and coaxed into making the mirror its home. When you use these mirrors you gaze into them then suddenly you will see in the mirror some one standing behind you. Whatever you do, do not turn around. Remember that, never never turn around. What happens next? Good gracious, you just talk quietly to the figure or face in the mirror, close your eyes if you cannot bear it, but never, ever turn around. Mentioned in Doreen Valiente’s description of the exhibits at Cecil Williamson’s;House of Spells at Polperro (Transcripts from Doreen Valiente’s Diaries 1959-1966, in the museum library. She describes it as a very fine piece of wood-carving;, and as she was later photographed with just such a mirror it is tempting to think she was inspired by seeing this one to acquire one herself. ” (Quote from the museum of witchcraft archives)

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